It is so important to put some time into planning for your destiny and next 10 years. Otherwise, we will just drift over the next 10 years and never accomplish anything in our lives.So here are the notes from my sermon just so that you can put some effort into planning:

Nine Steps in Possessing Your Destiny

I. Review.
A. There are two important truths about your destiny:
1. God’s destiny for my life is good.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
>You may have had a terrible past. You may have had a painful past. But the truth is… the story isn’t over. God says we have a hope and a future.
2. I get to choose my destiny. God gives us a choice.
B. There are three things you have to do to possess your destiny.
1. The first thing that you must do to possess your destiny is to Prepare a Plan. Planning is a spiritual activity.
* God wants to give you the desire of your heart, but there’s a catch-they are tied to planning.
Psalm 20:4 “May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.”
Question: Do you have a life plan?
2. The Second Thing that you need to do to possess your destiny is build your life completely on God’s Word.
Joshua 1:7-8 “But be careful to obey [not some but] all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go.
3. The Third Thing you must do to possess your destiny is courageously step out in faith.
C. We have a decade of destiny ahead of us. Decade of Destiny is a ten year plan for success in fulfilling two things: 1) your personal destiny and 2) our church family’s destiny.
*We have a destiny as individuals and we have a destiny together. Of all the people in the world that God brought to WCC, he brought you here because he wanted you here.
D. Having a Vision or dream is critical to possessing your destiny.
Proverbs 29:18 “Where there is no vision the people perish.”
Question: How do we take the vision or dream that God has given us and make it happen in our life? How do we get from where we are to where we want to be?
*The goal of Decade of Destiny is to help you get a focus on your life so that the next ten years of your life are the best ten years of your life.
E. There is nothing more powerful than a focused life.
>Light is a great example of focus. Light that is unfocused, light that is diffused has no power. But if you focus it like with a little magnifying glass – some of you remember when we were kids, little boys, we used to burn bugs and grass and light paper on fire with a magnifying glass.
>If you focus light even more, it becomes a laser and a laser can cut through steel. And a laser can kill a cancer. The more focused your life is the more impact it will have.
*God doesn’t want us to be a jack of all trades, He wants us to excel in one thing.
Philippians 3:13 Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But this one thing I do…
Proverbs 22:29 Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will serve before kings; he will not serve before obscure men.
*For the next four weeks, we’re going to look at the very different important key areas of your life: your health, your wealth, your career, your family, your time, your dreams and vision – all of the major areas.
*We’re going to help you in the weeks ahead set some goals and some plans in your health and in your work and in your family and in your finances and all of these different areas. As your pastor I am committed to you being successful in the next ten years of your life. I want your life to be meaningful, I want your life to be successful, I want your life to be significant.
*Today we are going to look at a story in the life of Abraham: this takes place toward the end of his life and he has something he needs to accomplish-get a wife for his son Isaac.
He sends his servant Eliezer to find a wife for Isaac. In this story we find nine keys or steps that everyone needs to do to fulfill a goal, to reach a dream, to see your vision become reality, to make the next ten years the best ten years of your life. We will be looking in the 24th chapter of Genesis.
*If you are going to get where you need to go in the next decade you also need to do these nine things
II. Step One: Determine your present Location.
*You can’t figure out where you want to go until you know where you already are. We need to take a long look at ourselves and ask ourselves a few questions:
Question 1: Where am I now?
Which is where am I now financially? Where am I now emotionally? Where am I now in my career? Where am I now relationally? Where am I now spiritually? Where am I in my life’s journey?
Question 2: What would I like to change?
*In our story, this is the first thing that Abraham asked himself.
And his answer was: I’d like to get my son a wife. I’d like him to get married.
Genesis 24:1 “Abraham was now old and well advanced in years, and the Lord had blessed him in every way.” Blessed in every way but one-he had no grandchildren.
*The point is that time is running out for Abraham. He says I’d better get moving!
A. Whatever you intend to do with your life, you’d better get on it for two reasons: one, it takes longer than you think; two, you aren’t getting any younger.
>“One of these days I’m going to get around to it… Someday I’ll…” You need to do it now.
*God always talks about now-now is the day of salvation; now is the time for action. NOW!
That’s why in Decade of Destiny we’re going to help you get started on where you’re going in the next ten years. I don’t want the next decade to be like your last decade. You can either drift through life or you can be directed through life. I’m going to help you find some direction for these key areas of your life.
B. Some may think, “I’m too old to set a goal.” I want to remind you that when Abraham set this goal he’s a hundred fifteen. So once you reach a hundred sixteen you can stop making goals.
*We will always need a dream or vision in our life.
*If you are living without a dream or vision right now, you are just existing.
III. Step two: Describe exactly what you want.
A. Write down on paper what you want to accomplish in the next ten years.
*Don’t be vague. Vague goals are never accomplished. The more specific you are the better it is. When you are specific you not only want to know what you want but what you don’t want in life.
*Abraham paints a clear picture for his servant Eliezer. He tells him what he wants and he tells him what he doesn’t want.
Verse 3-4: “Don’t get a wife for my son from the Canaanite girls who live around here. Instead, go back to my country, to the land of my relatives and get a wife for my son Isaac.” He saying, I want a wife for my son of the same nationality, the same hometown, same faith. He’s very specific. He’s very precise.
B. Here are four questions that you need to ask yourself today to help you be specific with your dreams and goals:
1. What do I want to be?
2. What do I want to do?
3. What do I want to have? What do I not have that I would like to have in ten years?
4. The most important question: Why do I want it? Why is more important than what.
James 4:3 When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.
>I want a higher paying job. Why? Because I want to be able to do more with my life and money for God’s kingdom. -or- I want a new job so that I can buy a new car, house and tv.
>I want to lose weight. Why? Because I want a husband –or- I’ll feel better about my self. My health will be better and maybe I can get off of insulin.
C. Every goal has to have a value, reward, or payoff.
*If you don’t have a reward or goal or pay off attached to your goal it won’t hold you.
*Jesus always talks about the rewards that follow our actions: “If you do this it will be rewarded.” Jesus understood that there are benefits to living in the right way.
Question: Why is it important to know why?
Answer: If you don’t know why you’re going after what you’re going after in life, you’re going to give up when times get tough.
>Many marriages give up along the way, because they never knew WHY they were together in the first place. God puts us together not just to have kids and talk to each other, but because He has a kingdom, and together, you and your wife can do something great for God’s kingdom.
Why is important.
D. What is it that’s going to motivate Eliezer to go find a wife for Isaac in another country? He’s got four motivations.
1. Isaac will get a wife.
2. His master, Abraham, will be pleased.
3. God’s purpose will be fulfilled.
4. Four, he’ll get a reward.
*He knows not only what he’s going to do, but why he’s going to do it.
*Listen to this:
E. Never confuse the decision making phase with the problem solving phase in your life. Most people try to solve all the problems before they set their first goal. That a bad idea! Bad idea. If you try to solve all your problems before you set your goals, you will never do anything.
*Set your goal, then solve your problems.
> In the early sixties John F. Kennedy announced a major goal for America. He said we’re going to put a man on the moon by the end of this decade. That was the decision that was made. The problems had not been solved. In fact, when Kennedy said we’re going to the moon by the end of this decade it was scientifically, physically and mathematically impossible. The technology had not been invented. The science had not been invented. The mathematic equations had not been invented when he said it. But he made the decision and then over the years they solved the problems.
*If you try to solve every problem first, you’ll never get ahead; you’ll never move forward.
v. 5 “Then the servant asked Abraham ‘What if the woman is unwilling to leave her home and come back with me to this land?
*Notice the phrase ‘what if.”
F. Listening to the “what if’s” of your life will keep you from fulfilling your destiny. You cannot listen to the “what if’s” of your life. Worry and fear will paralyze you.
*The antidote to the “what ifs” are found in step three:
IV. Step Three: You need to find a promise from God.
*The Bible has over seven thousand promises in it from God to you: promises of security, promises of safety, promises of provision, promises of prosperity, promises of success, promises of strength, promises of wisdom, promises about your health, promises of long life, promises about your family. And do you know the craziest thing?
*Most people go through life never claiming any of the promises of God that he’s made.
Question: Why does God make all these promises?
Answer: He wants you to learn to trust him.
>Abraham allays Eliezer’s fear by telling him that God had promised that he was going to be the father of a great nation
v. 7“Abraham said, ‘The Lord brought me from the land of my relatives to this land and he solemnly promised me [it’s based on a promise] that he would give this land to my descendents. So, he will send his angel before you, so that you can get a wife there for my son.’”
Question: How many of you would feel a lot better if God told you that an angel would go before you and help you in the next ten years?
*What if I told you that God has given you a better promise than He did to Eliezer?
A. You have a better promise than Abraham did.
Isaiah 43:1-3 Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
Jesus said, Matthew 28:20 And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
B. The size of your God will determine the size of your goal. If you’ve got a puny God you’re going to have puny goals. If you’ve got a big God you’re going to have big goals. It’s not me putting faith in myself; it’s me putting my faith in God and his promises. And his promises say ask for anything!
John 14:3 And I will do whatever you ask in my name,
John 14:14 You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.
John 15:16 I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.
Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,
*Get a promise from God!
V. Step Four: Ask God for help.
*Ask God for help in reaching your dream for the next ten years.
I Chronicles 4:10 Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.” And God granted his request.
Question: If God is no respecter of persons, why would He grant Jabez’s prayer for help and not yours?
v.12 “Then Eliezer prayed, ‘O Lord, God of my master Abraham. Give me success and show this kindness to my master, Abraham. Help me to accomplish the purpose of my journey.’”
Question: Is it ok to pray for success?
*What’s the alternative? God make me a failure.
*Of course God wants you to be all he made you to be. Of course God wants you to develop the talents he’s given you. Of course God wants to bless you so you can be a blessing to other people.
A. When your success helps others and when your success honors God you’d better be praying for it!
Hebrews 4:16 “So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it.” So you need to pray.
Question: Are you praying about your goals and dreams?
B. Prayer reveals two things:
1) it reveals how serious you are about your dreams.
2) it also reveals how much you’re depending on God. Because if you never pray about it, you’re depending only on yourself
VI. Step Five: Identify the barriers in your way.
A. You want to identify the barriers between you and your goal, vision, and dream for the next ten years of your life.
Question: Why don’t I have it already? Why am I not who I want to be? Why don’t I have what I want to have? Why don’t I do what I want to do? What are the roadblocks? What are the problems? What are the obstacles?
>They may be relational problems that you need to resolve in your marriage or with your friendships, or your parents. They may be financial barriers that have to be resolved. They may be educational barriers.
>Ignorance may be your barrier. Maybe there are some things you’ve got to learn before God can give it to you. You say, I need to go back and get some education or do this – educational barriers.
>There may be emotional barriers that keep you from your dream. A lot of people sabotage their own success because they don’t feel they deserve it – I don’t deserve it…
>Character issues may be an issue stopping you from going further-lack of discipline & self-control, impatience.
*Eliezer in this story faces a number of seemingly impossible barriers. Think about this: First, he’s got to go to a country he’s never been to and there are no maps. Second, he’s got to find just the right young woman to marry Isaac and not make a mistake. He’s got to convince her to come back with him, a total stranger, to a country she’s never been to and marry a man she’s never met. Then he’s got to convince her parents to let her do that.
*There’s a word for this: mission impossible!
*What you need to do in this phase is write down on paper your goals, God’s promises, and then write down the barriers. Once you’ve done that you come to step 6.
VII. Step Six: Create a step by step plan.
That’s what Eliezer did. And this is what you’re going to need to do in Decade of Destiny – create a step by step plan.
>Eliezer designs a very simple plan: “Eliezer took with him ten of Abraham’s camels loaded with samples of the best of everything his master owned. He journeyed to Iraq, Nahor’s village. There he made the camels kneel down outside the town beside a well. It was evening and the women of the village were coming out to draw water. He thought ‘I will ask one of them for a drink. If she says ‘Yes, certainly, and I’ll water your camels too’ – let her be the one you have appointed as Isaac’s wife.’”
Question: Why is this important?
*Camels can drink a lot of water. If you’ve got ten camels and maybe you’re going to get four or five buckets of water for each one, that’s fifty buckets of water.
*What is he doing here? He’s looking for a woman who is kind, who is generous, who has a servant’s heart, who goes the extra mile. He’s looking for a woman of character.
*Here’s his simple step-by-step plan. First, go to the watering well where women hang out. Second, he sets up the test. Third, he gives her some expensive gifts. Fourth, he gets invited to her home. Fifth, at the home he shares his purpose. Sixth, he pops the question.
*You need to do this too. You need to think through a course of action.
A. A plan has three parts: It has steps, deadlines and a schedule. A goal is worthless until you get it on your schedule because everything eventually deteriorates into work.
*You need to ask yourself two questions as you make a plan:
1. How do I intend to get there by the end of this decade?
2. How long will it take? For example, by this year I want to have done this
*Some of you are thinking, Pastor Steve, this is a lot of work! All this planning.” And you’re right. And you don’t have to do it. Go ahead! Drift through the next decade and it’ll be just like the last one
>A recent Harvard study showed that 95% of all Americans do not have any written down goals. Only 5% of Americans do what I’m sharing with you right now, have written down, visible, specific goals. Those same 5% happen to be the highest earners in America.
Question: Are the next ten years of your life worth a few hours of thinking right now? Yes! Are the next ten years of your life worth a few hours of planning and praying and giving some serious thought to this? Yes! If it’s not you’re just going to drift through life.
B. You can determine your own destiny. God gives you the choice. He says “I set before you blessing and cursing, life and death. Choose life.”
VIII. Step Seven: Be patient and persistent.
*The reason why you have to be patient and persistent is because it isn’t going to happen overnight.
A. The bigger your goal, the longer it will take. The more significant your goal, the more time will be involved, and energy.
*The number one problem with most people is they set their goals too low and try to accomplish them too quickly. We overestimate what we can do in a year but we underestimate what we can do in ten.
B. Set big goals and then take a long time to reach them. That’s why we’re calling this the Decade of Destiny. Not day of destiny. Because where you want to be, you’re not going to do it overnight.
>Eliezer did this. He was an example of great patience and persistence. He waited at the well for the right woman. He didn’t spill his guts right there with her. He waited until he got to her home and was eating supper with her family.
*I want you to look at something very important in this story:
v. 33 “Then the supper was served, but Abraham’s servant said, ‘I don’t want to eat until I’ve told you why I’ve come.’”
C. For you to reach your goal you’re going to have to learn how to delay gratification.
>Most Americans have no concept of delaying gratification. It’s the reason why our entire nation is in debt, including the government. Because we don’t know how to delay gratification.
*Every time you buy something on credit you are not delaying gratification. You’re buying something you can’t afford now with money you don’t have. Credit is the number one example of our inability to put off pleasure until we can afford it. What we say is, “I want it and I want it now. I want it right now even if I can’t afford it.” That’s why we get in debt, because we won’t delay gratification.

*The difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is successful people do the things that unsuccessful people are unwilling to do.
>Avocado orchard: Choice One: you could buy an existing orchard of 1,600 trees for $2.5 million. Or Choice Two: you could buy land, plant the trees and work the land for five years when it starts producing avocados. Price? $73,000. Your profit in the fifth year? $83,000. It is estimated that by doing this, your profit in the first eight years would be about $600,000. But you would have to wait and be patient for a few years.
God says in Habakkuk 2:3 “These things I plan [plan for your life] won’t happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, do not despair, for these things will surely come to pass. Just be patient! They will not be overdo a single day!”
IX. Step Eight: You must enlist a team for support.
*You’re never going to reach your goal on your own. You’re never going to fulfill your vision by yourself.
A. Success is never a one man show. You’ve got to involve other people. It takes teamwork. It takes cooperation.
>Robert Kyosaki in his book, Guide to Investing, says that “money is a team sport.”
>Eliezer does this. He enlists everybody he can to help fulfill his mission. He gets the parents involved, he gets the family involved, he gets the relatives involved for support. He does everything he can to get the cooperation of people around him.
>There is an African proverb that says: “If you want to go fast, go by yourself. If you want to go far, go with others.” If you want to go fast in life, go by yourself. But if you want to go far, you better go together.
B. I am convinced that we will not reach Alexandria by one person trying something. It will take all of us working together.
Ephesians 4:16 From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.
X. Step Nine: You must pay a price.
*There’s always a price tag and a cost for fulfilling a dream.
A. Right now, there are a lot of people bashing rich people in America.
>In the book The Millionaire Next Door they found that only 20% of wealthy people were raised wealthy.
1. That means that the majority of wealthy people were born poor and worked to became wealthy.
2. We must never bash the success of another person without knowing what they gave up for it. Because, I guarantee you, they did.
*Sometimes that giving up is worth it, and sometimes it is not worth it. They may have given up their health. They may have given up their family. They may have given up on God. They may have given up their integrity.
*Some things are worth giving up for a greater cause. But there’s ways a price tag to everything in life.
*I do know this: the habits of the wealthy are very similar. They work 60+ hours a week, live on 7% of their income, invest hugely, make huge and most wealthy people after all that work usually grow their wealth slowly over many years. Nothing is ever easy in life.
3. There’s only one thing free in life. Only one thing: and that is God’s forgiveness of your sins. And that’s only because Jesus Christ already paid for it.
*But there is an irony here. Salvation is free to us, but to qualify, we must give up who we were to become what God wants us to be. It is the great exchange. I give up everything that I have and God gives me everything He has. So in a real sense, it costs your life to follow Jesus.
B. Great goals require great sacrifice. A great sacrifice of time, of money, of energy, of reputation.
>A lot of people only want to be successful if it’s convenient. They only want to reach their dream, their goal if they can do it in their spare time.
*If you are serious about making the next ten years of your life the best decade of your life so far, you’re going to have to pay a price. That means asking three questions:
1. What will it cost in terms of energy, work, time, and money?
2. What am I willing to give?
3. Is the cause worth the cost?
*I’ve noticed now, dealing with a lot of people in life, most people are giving first class allegiance to second class causes. Those causes will inevitably betray them and they will be bitter for it.
C. The greatest use of your life is to invest it in that which will outlast it.
“What good is it if you gain the whole world but lose your soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?”
“Don’t begin until you count the cost.”
D. Let me give you Four challenges that you can do today to begin your “payment” for your decade of destiny.
1. Find who you are from our website.
2. Start your destiny right here in this church by doing something.
Matthew 25:21 ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things.
*If you are not already doing something here in this church, I have put a special insert in the bulletin. I want you to take it out now, and fill it out and I personally will give you a call this week to see how we can get you moving in on your destiny!
3. Come to the next four sermons of our series on decade of destiny.
4. Be open to whatever changes God wants to make in my life. That’s the cost of being a part of Decade of Destiny.

I wanted to give you my notes so that you could see my points and references. I have added them in outline form. So here it goes:
Fact #1: A recent study of over 5,000 obituaries in gay papers showed the average age of death for gay men from all causes to be 41 years old.
Fact #2: Homosexuals account for 80% of the serious sexually transmitted disease in the United States.
Fact #3: Gay men are six times more likely to have attempted suicide than straight men.
Fact #4: One study showed that between 25 and 33% of homosexual men and women are alcoholics (the national average is 7%).
Fact # 5: A Kinsey Institute study showed 43% of gay men estimating that they had had 500 or more partners, 28% over 1,000.( Over half of the respondents to this survey revealed that the majority of their sexual partners were people they did not know the day before they had sex with them.)
Fact # 6: 70% of Americans with AIDS are homosexuals.
Fact #7: Violence is much higher in homosexual relationships than in heterosexual ones.
Fact #8: Children raised by homosexual parents are documented in study after study to be more apt to experience gender and sexual confusion; they are more apt to become promiscuous; they are at greater risk of losing a parent to AIDS, substance abuse or suicide.
Fact #9: Children raised by homosexuals suffer more depression and other emotional difficulties. They are also more likely to engage in same-sex behavior.
*Homosexual advocates want us to believe that homosexuality is inborn. Why? The reason for this is that in the words of Howard Dean, “If God made them that way, He must be in agreement with them.” Thus, if people are born homosexuals, then homosexuality must be both normal and moral.
A. Research Studies. There are three studies that have been touted by pro-homosexual advocates: Dr. Simon LeVay’s hypothalamus study, Bailey & Pillard’s twin study, and Hamer’s chromosome study.
1. In the hypothalamus study, Dr. LeVay examined a small sample of hypothalamuses in corpses of both homosexual and heterosexual men and women. Some of the homosexuals studied died of AIDS. He found that their hypothalamus was signifigantly smaller in homosexual men. (The hypothalamus is the part of the brain that is believed to control sexuality.)
Problems with this study:
1. The hypothalamus is the size of a pinhead. Researchers still debate whether weight or volume is a more accurate measurement (i.e. we don’t exactly know how to accurately measure the hypothalamus).
2. Results do not prove causation: does being a homosexual happen because the hypothalamus is smaller, or does adopting homosexual practices cause the hypothalamus to shrink.
3. Do the drugs taken to extend the life of an AIDS patient also cause the hypothalamus to shrink.
4. As a result, most researchers discard this study as being able to prove genetic factor in homosexuality.
2. In the Bailey & Pillard’s twin study, twins were studied and found that if one twin was homosexual, there was a 40-50% chance that the other one would be also.
Problems with this study:
1. If it were genetic, there should be a 100% correlation.
2. This study actually shows that more than genetics, the things that happen in your life and family as a child have a direct correlation in whether you will choose a homosexual lifestyle or not.
Dr. Pillar himself says that “sexuality is greatly influenced by the environment, and that the role of genetics is, in the end, limited.”
B. Experiments not replicable.
1. All three of these studies were conducted by a homosexual researcher.
2. When subsequent heterosexual researchers tried to replicate these studies, none have been replicated.
3. Most of these studies were subsequently shown to be seriously flawed.
4. In the case of the twin study, a later English study came up with very different results.
5. A Canadian group tried to replicate Hamer’s homosexual gene work and came up with results that contradicted his results.
C. The Scientific Community is now moving away from any genetic cause of homosexuality:
1. Masters and Johnson, the famous sex therapists, who have no objections to homosexuality per se, stated in their book, Human Sexuality: “The genetic theory of homosexuality has been generally discarded today” and “despite the interest in possible hormone mechanisms in the origin of homosexuality, no serious scientist today suggests that a simple cause- effect relationship applies.”
2. Ruth Hubbard, author of Exploding the Gene Myth and a board member of The Council for Responsible Genetics, stating that searching for a gay gene is not a worthwhile pursuit. “Let me be very clear,” she says, “I don’t think there is any single gene that governs any complex human behavior. There are genetic components in everything we do, and it is foolish to say genes are not involved, but I don’t think they are decisive.”
3. The Sex Information and Educational Council of the U.S. (SIECUS), an organization, which advocates homosexuality, states in their book Sexuality and Man:
“Man does not from birth possess an instinctive desire to achieve any specific goal in regard to sex, but that his sexual behavior is at any time the cumulative result of the learning and conditioning experience he had.”
4. Hamer (chromosome study) is quoted as saying, with respect to a genetic cause, “Clearly, there is a lot more than genes going on here.” Although, Hamer says he still holds to his belief in a gay gene for men, some time ago he announced that lesbianism is environmentally caused.
5. Lawrence Hatterer, a psychiatrist, who works with men desiring freedom from homosexuality (from a secular point of view), states in his book, Changing Homosexuality in the Male: “Homosexuals are made, not born.”
IV. What are the roots of homosexuality?
The three roots of homosexuality:
A. Root #1: The greatest factor in turning children into homosexuals is sexual molestation, incest, or rape. This is especially true in girls: it is the undisputed number one reason that propels a girl toward a lesbian identity. Incest (which we define as sexual contact with a family member, relative or regular caretaker) is the most common and damaging form of sexual abuse. Usually, the perpetrator is a male–a father, stepfather, uncle, or older brother–although women can be abusers, too. Incest wreaks incredible devastation because a child is betrayed and violated by the very people she should be trusting to care for and protect her Unable to deal with the trauma of such events, the child may minimize the abuse or even repress it completely. The tremendous volume of rage, hurt, and indignation goes underground, emerging later in a variety of choices, one of which for women might be a total rejection of men and a turning exclusively to women for love and affirmation.
*The rise of lesbianism in this day and age is not a testament to the openness of our modern society to sexuality, but to the pervasiveness of pornography which satisfies the user less and less until he must seek out “someone” to satisfy his sexual fantasies. Girls when raped turn one of two ways-
1) they either make a total rejection of men and get as overweight as possible to minimize the chances of repeat rape and incest, or
2) become sexually promiscuous leading to a life-time of emptiness, disease, and depression.
*A US film team was doing a documentary on female porn stars, but after a year of research canceled the making of the documentary because they found that every last porn star that they interviewed was raped as a child.
Root # 2 of homosexuality: a rift in the father-son or mother-daughter relationship growing up.
*Non-christian psychologists who work with homosexuals have changed their definition of a homosexual.
Moberly writes that the homosexual attraction is “a yearning for a connection with the father and for a stronger male identity because of an early defensive detachment from the father. Homosexuality was seen as a symptom, a natural reparative drive to make up for the loss of a profound connection between son and father during the boy’s childhood.”
*80% of individuals involved in homosexual behavior come from homes where the father was a substance abuser or addicted to some other behavior.
A. Life in the first five years-father and mother role models.
*Our first five years are crucial in our physical, emotional, and spiritual development. These are the years in which our mold for sexual roles develop.
1. God designed our first five years to be spent developing a deep, secure bond with our mother and father.
2. God designed that the young child see both father and mother roles, which not only help him understand and identify with a godly role model for life, but also show the child the eternal relationship between God the Father and the church.
3. God designed that the young child be inundated with His word and teaching about Him. God said, “These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)
4. God designed our bodies and brains that at the age of five, our brain gets “set in stone”. At age five, a protein sheath (mylenization of the cerebral cortex) grows over our brain and ends the way learning takes place in our brain. Many behaviors are set by this age.
*How many of you know that unfortunately, this loving, warm, and godly environment doesn’t always happen?
*What does this breakdown create?
1. When this mother/father foundation is disrupted, the child becomes vulnerable to all kinds of problems. Depending on the child’s temperament, this can be expressed by withdrawal, apathy, and passivity, or by intense aggression and uncontrolled emotion.
2. Infants and children who do not grow up in a nurturing environment, grow up sensing an inner emptiness which often later manifests in life as an overwhelming drive to connect with and find their identity in another person.
3. Sexual identity is largely shaped in the first five years. If boys don’t bond with a father or male figure early in life-this detached feeling and alienation lays the groundwork for sexual identity struggles later on in life. And in the same, way if girls lack an intimate relationship to Mom, this also translates into the beginnings of sexual identity struggles.
4. Inborn temperament also plays a role:
a. Boys who are born with a sensitive, intuitive, artistic nature can be more vulnerable to disruptions in their relationships with their fathers. In fact, if a little boy like this experiences rejection and ridicule from his dad, it’s almost a sure bet that he will have sexual identity struggles later on. However, if this “love deficit” is filled by a loving grandfather, stepfather, or significantly older brother, the negative effects can be minimized.
b. Some baby girls come out of the womb hollering, kicking, and looking like they’re ready to train for the heptathlon. If Baby Olympia has a mom and dad who also are aggressive and athletic, or who, at least, enjoy these characteristics, she probably will grow into a strong, confident heterosexual woman.
But sometimes a mother will struggle to accept an aggressive, active daughter, and the little girl will sense her mother’s ambivalence. Feeling wounded and rejected, the girl may further detach from her mother, cutting herself off from the very source of love she needs to help her grow into her own female identity. In turn, she is left with a same-sex love deficit, leaving her vulnerable to future lesbian involvement.
Root #3: Being treated as an outsider among one’s peers during childhood and adolescence.
A. Life in Grade School-the introduction of peer influence.
The Grade School period is when our mold for sexual identity begins to be poured with cement.
1. A little boy already estranged from his father is now probably getting the same treatment from his peers, along with some nasty labeling and name-calling: “Ralph is a ______” (fill in “sissy,” “gay,” or other label).
2. Rather than face the humiliation sure to be encountered in team sports, Ralph and others like him often develop solitary pursuits: reading, drawing, music, computers, television. They might cultivate girls as their companions, learning to jump rope, volunteering to “play house.” Or they might team up with other shy and withdrawn boys like themselves and even begin some sexual experimentation.
3. For girls, the grade school years often hold powerful events that contribute to later lesbian involvement. In the first few grades, a “tomboy” is not so likely to experience teasing and rejection from other girls. But our sexually-oriented culture races children toward premature puberty. By second or third grade, most little girls are concerned about being pretty, popular, having the right clothes, and giggling about boyfriends. (Actually, much of this is already underway in kindergarten.) The girl who doesn’t share these interests, who truly prefers sports, roughhousing, and being buddies with the boys, is probably starting to feel disconnected from other girls.

Please copy this and post it on your refrigerator:
2 Chronicles 7:14 if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

1. Pray for our President, that God would protect him and that God would touch and change his heart and that he would have a true conversion experience.
I Timothy 2:1-2 I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.

2. Pray that God would give us a heart of prayer and intercession for our country, economy, and families.
Ezekiel 22:30 “I looked for someone among them who would build up the wall and stand before me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found no one.

3. Pray that God would give us divine ideas to benefit the people.
Ephesians 1:17 I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation

4. Pray that God would turn our hearts to one another.
Malachi 4:6 He will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents; or else I will come and strike the land with total destruction.”

5. Pray that God would give us a building for a church.
Matthew 7:7,8, 11 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened… If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

6. Pray that God would give us the right people for our Joseph company (people with divine ideas for multiplying money for God’s kingdom) and that God would give us divine ideas for the coming time.
Genesis 45:7 But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.
Genesis 50:21 So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.

7. Pray that God would show us a plan on what to do this year.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

8. Pray that God would give us new worshippers and worship leaders.
John 4:23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks.
9. Pray that God would protect Israel and bring revival to Israel.
Psalm 122:6 Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: “May they prosper who love you.
Romans 10:1 Brethren, my heart’s desire and my prayer to God for Israel is for their salvation.

10. Pray that God would spare the DC area from terrorist attacks.
Psalm 33:18-20 But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield.
Psalm 91:1-8 Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked.

11. Pray for a third great awakening in our country-that God would turn our nation back to its God.
Psalm 85:6 Will you not revive us again, that your people may rejoice in you?

I just heard a great testimony from one of our own on how God had really blessed her in amazing ways during her fast this month. So I want to reprint what she had written:

I would like to encourage everyone to join the church in fasting for the remaining days in February. I echo Pastor Steve’s comments that you should take baby steps towards fasting for God. Please do not get caught-up in fear or worry that you cannot do it, because you can. In my opinion, the first step to a successful fast for God is to pray and ask Him what type of fast you should do, what you should give up, the number of days as well as how long each day. If you ask Him, He will answer. Please remember that it is not just about the food. Will you get hungry? Yes, of course you will, but the goal is to fast to show God that you are seeking Him, that you are in an alliance with Him and that you want a closer relationship with Him….because you know what, He wants a closer relationship with you. How special is that!!! Once you start your fast, then make time to pray. Do not expect to be a marathon prayer in the beginning. In a perfect world, it would be ideal if you could pray for hours & hours, but how realistic is that for you in your life? Again, start out with baby steps and take a few minutes to pray when you get up in the morning and then throughout the day whenever it comes to mind. Please take the same approach towards reading your bible. I would love to spend the day reading, but I cannot so I set aside short periods during the day to read and then spend a little more time reading at home. Please know that you are not alone in your fast; God is right there with you to help you as you fast and pray. Last, but not least, make it a truly selfless act by setting aside time to be of service to others…maybe a little volunteer work or perhaps donating non-perishables to a local food bank, or checking on an elderly neighbor, etc. It will speak volumes to God and He will not disappoint. Psalms 34:8 says “taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in Him.” I bid you God’s speed.
D. Farmer

Some of you are saying to yourself, “Pastor, I have never fasted, but I am now at least open to fasting. But how am I to do it, what are the steps because I think that if I were to go on a fast, my body would cry out ten minutes later it is telling you that if I don’t feed it, I’ll die.”
Step One: Don’t start out fasting by fasting ten days or four weeks!
Isaiah 58:5 says: Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for a man to humble himself?
1. The typical fast mentioned in the bible is a 24 hour time period, not a 40 day fast.
2. The Hebrew concept of day was that a day started at nightfall, so the typical Bible fast was sunset to sunset.
3. If you start fasting, don’t try a marathon. A day is a great fast.
4. Don’t let condemnation hit you if you can’t last the whole 24 hours.
5. A fast is not just not eating-that’s what we call a diet.
The Bible talks about prayer and fasting. Fasting should always be full of prayer. It should be a time that we are praying, reading your Bible and seeking God.
6. A typical fast is just drinking water. But there are also partial fasts which we call Daniel fasts.
*In Daniel 10, we see Daniel fasting for three weeks. He is about 80 at the time. He is praying and seeking God for a particular answer. But he’s 80, so he says to himself: Since I’m 80 here is what I’m going to do: I will not eat any sweets, no breads, no meats, no juice. Just vegetables and water. This is what we call a partial fast and is usually taken by people with medical conditions such as diabetes that couldn’t go through a normal fast.
Conclusion. We need to return to the Bible discipline of fasting.
*Fasting is saying, “God I’m drawing near to you. I want spiritual power. I am going to push away the plate. Food and the flesh are not going to dominate my life and I will take extra time to seek you.”
*There has been a movement in America to water down God’s word, and cheapen Christianity-I call it Christianity light-go to church when ever you can, give what ever you can, don’t condemn yourself if you can’t read the Bible or pray. But Christianity light can’t save you, in fact, it is the reason that so many Christians are deeply unsatisfied with their Christian walk.
John 1:4 In him was life, and that life was the light of men.
John 8:31-32 Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”